The Cyclic Turning of Life: From the Inside, Out

The Cyclic Turning of Life -- from the Inside Out
Our lives are an interconnected force bending and moving, attracting and retracting, growing and dying together, in a continual system of change. From the molecular structures unfolding within our being, creating our metabolic identity, to the developmental stages of our psychological growth, we are evolving through a cyclic continuum of life systems that coalesce with all other life emerging forms. In short, we are energetically inseparable from all that is and have an imminent responsibility to evolve in consciousness through self-reflection, self-care and the care of all of life.

Chickasaw novelist, Linda Hogan, writes in the book, Mean Spirit, “We are part of everything in our world, part of the roundness and cycles of life. The world does not belong to us. We belong to the world. All life is sacred. Restore yourself and your voice. Remake your spirit, so that it is in harmony with the rest of nature and the universe” (McLuhan, 1994).

This is an essential re-membering of who I AM, of my divine heritage, and with this knowing comes a commitment of Truth and integrity that is inherent in the path of self-discovery -- going deep, ripping the seams of old patterns, pulling the threads of denial, reworking the fabric of identity to that which is beyond the restrictions of social, cultural and personal norms. This is my story.

Running on Energy
There is a reciprocal flow of energy that is exchanged in the process of evolution and growth. This energy has a design, a divine order, intricately woven into the atmosphere of creation. From conception, our bodies are forming an energetic grid work of DNA. This “system” of creation is part of our own inner knowing. It is connected to the womb, our mother’s womb, and the womb of our Earth Mother. Our fathers have planted the seeds. Our mothers have agreed to carry us through our cycles from conception to birth and through the growth of many moons thereafter. If we pay attention to these cycles, we can see the interconnectedness of who we are with all things and with the world, as a whole.

When I was a child, I was creating a story. My story was made up of the energy that I was surrounded by. My parents taught me and “guided” me into the social norms of what was right or wrong, what was real or not (through their eyes and what had been passed down to them from their parents). And then there was this other force. This force was something beyond comprehension yet deeply rooted in my psyche, within my core being. It was as if I had eyes that could see the world beneath that which was cognitively understood as “real.” These eyes dwelled inward and I could feel this luminous thread connecting each of us. It was as if my heart could not contain itself. The pain seemed unbearable at times. It wasn’t a pain that was inflicted upon me. My childhood was good. This pain was felt, beneath the surface layers of existence, under the radar of that which I was creating on the outside. What I didn’t know, at the time, was that these “worlds” were not separate at all. I could not, yet, see the divine grid that blended these worlds, as one. There was a veil, a memory that was placed before me in which I had to re-member in order to move beyond the veil of my identity.

Barbara Marx Hubbard said in her recent ACE (Agents of Conscious Evolution) online training program (2011), “Cosmogenesis is cosmic evolution studied from the outside, but the soul of evolution is subjective and is studied from the inside, out.” For me, going within was always followed with an emergence of loss and then, gain. Learning how to adjust to the cyclic changes and recognize the patterns, unfolding, was part of my own soul evolution. Through this learning or “awakening” process was the assurance that all energy being utilized was for the betterment of all, that my forward movement was a reflection of the forward movement of the planet and the cosmological ordering of the changing “times.” Thus, nothing was lost – even in my darkest moments, nothing was lost.

No Waste
During my adolescent years, I yearned to know myself. I did this by channeling my energy in creative ways. As a writer and poet, I expressed the angst and frustration of feeling “less than” who I was. I still attracted the light but always through partners who mirrored the veil that hung, like a cloak, over my eyes. I was also a runner. There was a loss and a gain to this predicament. I was the fastest runner on both my cross country and track teams. I was quiet. I had a plan to leave it all behind. You see, running was a metaphor to me. I was running from this pain that I knew as a child. The world was suffering, I could feel it. But in this world, this poetic and athletic world, I could, literally, FLY into another dimension where pain was an illusion, albeit temporary. And I did this for six years until one morning…I woke up and arrived at my cross country meet. I looked into my coaches eyes and asked, “Don’t you ever get tired of running?” In that moment, I was asking on a physical level, but energetically, my soul was tired of running from the pain. It was that moment that allowed me to take a step into the acceptance of another cycle that had ended in my life. There is no wasted energy here. I was not going to exert myself in a way that was not beneficial to the whole. By quitting, I was allowing the world to win. I was allowing freedom into my breath again. And although I could look in the mirror, confused of my choices (that were beyond mind), deep down, I was smiling from the inside, out.

Diversity is Necessary
Life is filled with diversity - from the many forms that have evolved into existence, today, to the systems that keep these forms alive. Ecopsychologist, Theodore Roszak (1992, p. 179), states, “the flower seemed designed for the bee, the bee for the flower. Order in this sense is far from simple and may not be mathematical at all. Rather, it is the very intricacy of the arrangements that elicits wonder.” These arrangements are part of the reciprocity of discovery that is inherent within us. It is a natural attraction for the bee to be lured by the flower and the flower to open its buds and share the divine nectar of life with this bee. Life is like this – simply divine in order yet somehow complicated with the mental capacity we yield upon it.

As I recall my own arrangements in life, I see the necessity of the exchange(s) that happened with each turn. A dear friend of mine, Ahmath, was very different from me when I met him. He was African America and incredibly in tune with his own cultural and ancestral heritage. He was also dying. I was 22 at the time and had just begun a new journey after a heart-felt “awakening” or “re-birth” into the cosmic consciousness I was so trying to re-connect with through my childhood. It only made sense that I would be accompanied with a growing love with my new friend that was, subsequently, holding onto a short life-string in the physical realm. This was when I learned of my psychic connections (that were being re-awakened of what I had lost in my childhood) and how the energetic grid between the worlds that I knew created an even wider meaning of what “diversity” meant to me.

Through these experiences, upon deaths such as my friend, Ahmath and other friends and family members, I was opened to the arrangements that exist beyond the physical mind and being to that of a soul-ular connection. In these lucid experiences, the memory of this veil became penetrable and thus, the fragmented illusions of self were freed from my own mental entrapments. It is not that everything had changed with these experiences. No; it was just the Truth unveiling the mystery within my very core -- the Truth that nothing is separate, everything is connected, and we are only as diverse in perception as we allow ourselves to be.

Connection Leads to Change
By recognizing our interrelatedness, we are recognizing the value of our true essence in life. There is purpose in this recognition that is only honored by seeing all of life as a direct reflection of who we are. There is no doubt that pain exists. It is part of the “going deep” process that opens us to our divine heritage – the Truth that we are beneath the pain in which we feel. If we become numb to this pain, then we are choosing to forget to re-member our divine essence through humanity.

Change is inevitable; this much we know. Yet it is up to us to be CAUSAL in our expression(s) of change. Barbara Hubbard (2011) continued this idea when she said:
We are in our own birth narrative and are “story tellers” – we have the ability to be causal and see our own crises to improve and evolve our own creative potential and thus, the world. There are emergent properties here where the planet is going through evolutionary consciousness (we are at the advents of conscious evolution). Our own impulse to create, incarnating the impulse of evolution from our 13 billion year story says that when we tune into this impulse and want to do more, be more, express more, we feel LIFTED - not burdened - by this impulse and are then set free from limitations.

As a conscious being, I take an oath with my reflections before me, all of life, and find peace in the agreements I make for a sustainable and peaceful future, now. I have a daughter who is my witness, and I make amends with my past to allow for her life to evolve in a way that supersedes the restrictions I placed upon myself before. I am not these restrictions but a divine spark mirroring and shining upon the world as the world shines upon me.

There is no separation here; we are all connected; and by choosing to be causal in my re-membering, I am also choosing Love as the envisioned change that is happening within and without me. I do this not only for my daughter and her generation, but for seven generations to come…
For life is worth loving ourselves and the greater whole.



References
Hubbard, Barbara M. "Accelerating the next evolution." Agents of conscious evolution. 3 May 2011. Web. 6 May 2011.
T.C., McLuhan. The way of the earth. New York: Simon & Schuster, 1994. Print.
Roszak, Theodore. The voice of the earth. 2nd ed. Grand Rapids: Phanes Press, Inc., 1992. 179. Print.

Moving Beyond Separation to Symbiotic Expression: A Systems Approach to the Great Turning

Moving Beyond Separation to Symbiotic Expression:
A Systems Approach to the Great Turning

According to Paul Hawken (2007), environmentalist and author, the state of this world is evolving into a place of “blessed unrest” between the one and the many. The one is no more separate from what people claim as being “different” from their selves. We are one and the same, no difference.
Yet, at one point in time, there was misrepresentation of the human conception of life. There was the thought that we were, inherently, separate from ALL THERE IS which, ultimately, resulted in the disconnection of species on the planet. There was a distinct placement of doubt that resonated through the w(hole) of existence that challenged the constructs of mind and habitual patterning, developed through the millenniums up to this moment in history.
In this paper, I reflect on the degree of separation we have created, as humans, from ourselves, each other and all of life and speak of the abundant energy necessary to rise up and release the constructs of the mind within this universal context of understanding --and return to the core integration of our symbiotic existence on Earth.
Unraveling the Memory
When I consider how our existence came to be, there is a fine line, I notice, that bleeds into my awareness with a perception unlimited to “time” and knowledge, itself. This depth of perception is the wisdom of the archaic Truth embedded through the lineage of our primordial memory. This “memory” unravels itself into a diverse continuum of life-emerging forms. Such structuring of form has been a result of a systematic dialogue between Nature and a self-organizing Universe inherent in its divine order of creation.
Physicist and systems theorist, Fritjof Capra (1982), addressed these patterns of emergence as a “web of life” in which there are two complementary tendencies that contribute to the phenomenon of evolutionary adaptation : (1) Self Maintenance (the process of self-renewal, healing, homeostasis, and adaptation) and (2) Self Transformation/Self Transcendence (expressed from the process of learning, development and evolution).
These self-organizing drives coalesce with the structural adherence and genetic mechanisms of DNA formation through reproductive and hereditary traits, but also through the “underlying dynamics of evolution, whose central characteristic is not adaptation but creativity” (Capra, 1982).
Through the lens of transpersonal creativity (or creation), it is important to note that these molecular structures, that attract and retract from the physical appearance(s) before us, are only limited by the subsequent “knowledge” derived from the belief structures (or illusions) we create(d) in our mind. Thus, when I see myself as a limited reflection of that which surrounds, I limit the entirety of existence itself. I exclude myself from the constant flow of energetic exchange that creates space for evolutionary fulfillment. Because of our dualistic human nature, it is difficult for many people to conceptualize that we ARE an intricate part of this self-organizing Universe. Thus, our disconnection with the environment (and Self) has become the real crisis in the world today; A crisis, “some wise people have suggested, that stems from a genuine lack of creativity and imagination” (ATD, p. 55). So, how do we fulfill the necessary changes needed to sustain the life of the earth in which we cohabitate?
First, we must recognize that we are not separate from each other or this planet-- that we are, in fact, a social and global “community,” and it is our responsibility to come together and co-create a reality based on a collective vision (imagination) of a Life-sustaining Society by consciously changing our perspective to one that mirrors our innate ecological self .
Our Stories Create our Reality
By default, Nature IS self-organizing. Our development, as humans, has taken this concept, this reality, and centralized it into an illusory dream in which we “control” everything. But life is not like that. From the book, The Medicine Wheel, Chippewa medicine man, seer, and Indian leader, Sun Bear writes:
“Today we tend to see the earth as a stable backdrop for all of the affairs of humankind. We see the minerals, the plants and the animals as servants of man. We have forgotten that they can be our teachers as well; that they can open us to ideas and emotions that have been blocked from the human heart for too long a time. We have forgotten that we are connected to all of our relations on the earth, not just our human families. We have imprisoned ourselves in tight little worlds of man-made creations.”

This being said, our habitual patterns and misunderstandings of this “separation” with life have been passed down from generations preceding our own existence and therefore, become hard to break. From a psychological perspective, we can look at the early stages of development in which developmental psychologist, Piaget, concludes that the ego is formed during the pre-operational stage (2-6 years of age) (Sigelman and Rider, p. 46). During this stage, thinking is not yet logical and perception is limited to an egocentric view in which the child is unable to take on another’s perspective. A sense of separation is established and with this growing sense of separate-self, coupled by the dominant consumerist approach from the Industrial “Growth” Society in which we are raised, comes a disconnection with the world, as a whole. Although we might recognize that we feel good in nature and share similarities with many species (to include our own), our egocentric world-view keeps us in an autonomous state where we, as individuals, are in competition with each other, all species and the illusory “need” to industrialize what few natural resources remain on the earth today.
As I look at my own life, I recall emotional and psychological “traps” that have imprisoned my own mind, psyche, and being to a place of indecision, judgment (of self and others), and ultimately, created self-destructive tendencies of denial that perpetuated out into the living world around me-- to all my relations. For instance, since early childhood, I have looked in the mirror of doubt when my attraction to nature was diffused, even demolished (in a psychological sense), from the inherent connection I had with it. I observed the mass of society and life, in general, as having a huge element of suffering in it; From the homeless animals on the street and in captivity, to the homeless people sitting on the side of the road, holding signs, to the insects and creepy crawlers that were killed with poisonous chemicals (and sometimes with a look of pure aggression - and then gainful satisfaction - on the face of the “killer”) as they got rid of the “pest” that was interfering with the human world. The pain I witnessed and subsequently felt, although I wasn’t aware of what was happening to me on a deeper level, was becoming numb.
By the time I turned ten years old, I had retracted into my own private dream-world where pain did not exist and even if it did come up in my life (which, of course, it did), I could write about it or tell stories into a tape recorder of how this world was “different” for me now – how I could use my imagination to create a utopian, ideal life where all things were beautiful, peaceful and all “systems” worked together in a unifying degree of reciprocity. I knew, deep down, that I cared about life and I also cared about what people thought of me. I was torn (the duality) between the Truth that I was a part of this intricate web of life and the illusion in which I was being socially and culturally “raised” to believe was the truth.
Healing the Separation
Metabolically, DNA forms the grid work for the duality of separateness (through hereditary values and individual traits) yet simultaneously releases the same molecular brain structure that has the potential (in all) to return to the delicate atomic level of peace within. The metaphorical “serpent” (or kundalini), that contains/is our vital, life-giving energy, spirals in a continual dance that becomes the double helix of reciprocal understanding within us. Our DNA twists and unravels with each curve of our spine – breaking old patterns into illuminated portals of energy. What transpires from this mirror image reflecting through the darkness, into the constructs of mind, is the direct conception of power birthing from the heart center of Love.
Any divine form wishing to transcend to its original form-less nature/state can do so when the reflection of another is seen as our own. This “returning” is the release of the constructs of illusion in the mind.
Joanna Macy (2011), eco-philosopher, author and activist, looks at a systems approach to the Great Turning -- where we are being called to reconnect with the Truth that we are during this ecological and economical crisis and begin to “WAKE UP and take ACTION knowing that we have the authority of our 14 billion age of existence to create a pathway to liberation – freed from our self-created suffering.”
By following the Four Noble Truths of Buddhism, through an ecological perspective, we have the ability to:
1) Befriend our pain for the world and know that our caring and compassion stem from our interconnectedness (our inter-being) with all things.
2) Know that this suffering has a cause arising from conditions that we CAN change through developing right action in behavior, attitudes and ideas. (Finding this cause is a systematic response to the feedback loops presented in our lives and the world).
3) Cease the suffering by recognizing our interconnectedness to all of life and consciously choosing to break free from our limiting habits, patterns, and belief structures that have been contributing to the Industrial “Growth” Society and begin to create a Life Sustaining Society.
4) Follow and create a pathway to liberation and freedom through the practice of self(less) discovery by approaching our meditations and actions through the holographic view of the Universe as non-separate from Self and all that exists (Macy, J; 2011).
Universal in Nature, our human-nature finds “home” in this Truth time and time again – beyond the scope of “time constraint” all together. Thus, the true purpose we heed, that perpetuates change and internal expansion of being, is the result of the degree of non-separation that we choose to accept into our life.
Healing with Love Creates Action
For me, “healing” occurs on many different levels. I think of the mind, body and spirit and the myriad philosophies and beliefs that are projected about how someone can or should heal yet, ultimately, I feel that this adventure, this life, is the healing process. From the innocence of birth and bonding to the realization that I AM someone (ego), to the “search,” yet again to find myself through all experiences, good and bad, healing happens. And even the word “healing” is an illusion because, deep down, within my most intimate, creative and expansive Self, I am already free from pain and suffering.
It has taken me a long time, as Sun Bear would say, for my heart to open to the Truth that this journey in life is one of discovery and Love. For Love IS the crucial ingredient we must embrace and use in the actions we take to fulfill our transition from chaos to a state of peace within the system(s) we live. What is Love, to me? Love is growth; Love is action; Love is breaking down (composting) every part of my "self" I believe is real. Love hurts so much it heals the heart with a compassionate yet disciplined slap to the ego.
What I have learned, in life, is that when I am ready to let down the guard that constrains my heart, restricts my breath, and pours longing from behind its shield, then Love comes - whipping my Spirit into a fine-grained substance of humility, self-acceptance, and a new desire for something so deep that all other self-created "needs" dissipate into the cleansing fire of Truth.
What resumes from such a cleansing is power. This "power" is the intensity of life where breath evolves, where my heart rejoices with the abundance of communion, and where my voice is blessed with angelic praise and raised to a vibration other worldly. It is moments, like this, my heart grows with the heavens and Love detaches from the face I thought I had. What is removed is gently replaced with an innocence unknown to time but brought to life with the power of healing.
And with this new sense of Self, emerges the “need” to bond with others wishing to do the same – people who are willing to take the initiative to rise above the constructs of the mind, their self and the collective “illusion” --and become an integral part of the Great Turning that is happening now.
Conclusion: The Great Turning to our Creative Self
What is “meant to be” is the primary evolution of Truth within our being. And what is birthing, in this moment, is a reflection of all that has transpired on a Universal scale of personal and cultural creation. There is birth, there is death, and there are the balancing forces that exist between the two. In mythology, the owl sees into the darkness of the contemplative mind and sheds light onto that which is not accessible otherwise. Thus, within this light, there is no lack of understanding because we make a conscious choice to join in this participatory revelation of cosmic consciousness, The Great Turning of Love.
This unlimited feeling pulses through our very core – integrating our divine allowance with what already “is.” Questions cease, answers naturally unveil in our consciousness and we are no longer held back by the mental stagnation of what “belonging” means through societal standards.
We are what we create and create that which we are in this reflective light. Who are you in this moment, now – what do you see when you look into the eyes of another? Do you shun your beauty? Reflect your Truth? Do you hold witness to the power before you? Do you embrace the imminent departure of fear that lurks through the Truth that you are “one” with all that you encounter? Do you embrace the power of your Being? Do you follow the eyes of doubt to the revelation beneath that which you see?
There is no doubt that, in this moment, we meet in the middle of that which we believe. Do not be afraid to unveil the secrets within. Do not be afraid to rise above the inventory of your upbringing. Find your heart through the eyes of another and know that Love exists in all beings, through all things, and that there is no separation in our Loving at all.




References
Awakening the Dreamer. Symposium Presenter's Manual. Vol. 2. San Francisco: Pachamama Alliance, n.d. 55. 2 vols. Print.
Bear, Sun, and Wabun Bear. The Medicine Wheel. New York: Simon & Schuster, 1980. 4. Print.
Capra, F. (1982). The turning point. New York: Simon & Shuster.
Hawken, Paul. Hawken, Paul. Blessed Unrest. New York: The Penguin Group, 2007. Print.
Macy, J. (2009). The Great Turning. Retrieved March 18, 2011, from http://www.joannamacy.net/livingsystems.html.
Macy, Joanna. "The Great Turning." Naropa University. Boulder. 6 Apr. 2007. Lecture.
Sigelman, C., & Rider, E. (2006). Life-span human development (6th ed., pp. 46-47). Belmont,
CA: Wadsworth Cengage Learning.